By Team Member Heather Jones
I can’t even remember what my first Mother’s Day was like. You would think it would be one of those things that are ingrained in your memories, but my first Mother’s Day was when my son, Caimen, was just a ‘raisen-baby’, as my partner Ken calls them. A squishy, little, wrinkly thing that didn’t do much, yet somehow took every minute of every day to keep alive! Caimen was a newborn and I was in that ‘new parent fog’ that often lasts the first few months after a baby is born (especially after your first!), and it seems to have given me amnesia – evolutionarily strategic? I think so 😉
As a child, I remember asking my mom every year, “What do you want for Mother’s Day?”, and every year, she was so selfless and humble and would always reply, “Nothing!”, followed by “Just for you and Linda (my younger sis!) to not fight.”, to which I would roll my eyes and was never able to actually do. Mom – if you’re reading this, I. Get. It. Holy marshmallow do I understand and I’m sorry!
I now have two kids of my own who seem incapable of being in the same room together for 2 minutes without bugging and poking and pushing all the buttons, and it’s awful! I realize now that all my mom ever wanted on Mother’s Day was to spend a nice day with her kids, laughing, playing and getting along with each other. That, and for us to STFU 😉 It’s incredible how much silence is taken for granted before one becomes a parent!
For the past few years, my Mother’s Days have included a nice long sleep-in, breakfast made to order when I finally emerge from my blanket-y paradise, homemade cards or crafts from my kids which they’re always SUPER excited to give me and even though they’re so, SO bad, I absolutely love the effort they put into them and proudly display them on our shelves and mantle. Then, as ironic as it is, I usually do something by myself, totally removed from parenting duties and fully detached from my kids. Last year, I went for a nice long run and although it was nice, and I often use exercise and/or kid-free time as self-care time, I couldn’t help but think that anyone seeing me run by would probably assume I was NOT a parent, because what mom doesn’t want to be with her kid(s) on Mother’s Day, right? Turns out, its most of us! Haha, just kidding – its all of us. But seriously now, the thought of the part of my identity as a parent being invisible to people surprisingly bugged me. Now, the fact that I thought everyone was watching me run by and actually pondering about me and my life is absurd and feels like a problem that needs attention, but that’s a whole other blog post 😉 What I am trying to say is that as much as I love (that word is not strong enough) ‘me-time’ away from my kids, as much as their fighting makes me want to rip my ears off, and as difficult and frustrating as it can be sometimes (often times….all the
time) to raise these tiny humans, I am so incredibly grateful to be their mom and am in love with the huge part of my identity that is ‘a parent’.
So although I’m not sure of what my Mother’s Day plans and activities will look like this year, I do know that I will take the time to be present with my kids, I will act surprised and over-the-moon impressed as I open whatever homemade gift they have for me this year, and I will soak up all the hugs and kisses and snuggles I can get because my kids are a big, awesome part of who I am and I wouldn’t change it for the world. Happy Mother’s Day to all of you!
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