It’s my birthday today. I am 51, which I guess means I have to stop celebrating my 50th ; )
Because I am in business for myself I generally try and take the day off on my birthday and today is no
exception. I have lunch plans with a good friend and dinner plans with two of my boys. As I sit here at a Radisson hotel in Kitchener eating my breakfast and enjoying an impromptu song by a choir staying here, I find myself reflecting on how happy I am today and why.
If you have followed my posts at all you may have noticed some slightly emotional, perhaps a tiny bit hormonal, outpourings of grief over my adult sons no longer being in my daily life. In fact, it is possible I have even been whining ever so slightly about how they don’t have time for me anymore…and how I don’t fit into their lives now that they don’t live at home.
Well, I am happy to say that as of late I have been coming out of my empty mom nest slump and am learning to accept my new relationship with my adult sons, and am even liking it. STOP! Before you go off thinking I don’t miss their adorable little toddler hugs and kisses and the daily rundowns of their day – I do. But we have evolved and the best part is that now that I am done feeling sorry for myself, I see how great that is too. New and still wonderful.
The reason I am in Kitchener at a hotel is because one of my twins goes to University in Waterloo. He called me and told me he misses me and wanted me to come down to visit yesterday. So what do I do? Drive to Waterloo of course! We had a really nice afternoon together where I was permitted to spend all kinds of money on him purchasing various supplies and groceries and then he took me out for dinner. We sat and talked over dinner for over 4 hours. As we ignored the waitress’s glares, we talked about everything. We even remarked on how great it is to just sit and chat like that. No phones, no distractions. Just good conversation.
All I could think was – lucky me. Our relationships have changed, but still the most important thing I can give my boys is my time (no problem!). And they are starting to understand the value of giving me their time. Motherhood takes on so many different forms and I think this whole new empty nest thing is going to work out after all.
If you ask someone who loves you what they really want most from you it is always going to come down to your time in some form. When someone says I want to spend time with you and sets aside time to do that – they are really saying – I love you.
Thank you for giving me your time today to read this. Please comment or like to say you did 🙂